When you postpone intimacy it lets you form a strong and lasting emotional bond, and it gives that love a chance to grown. Here are some keys to letting your love grow.
Let you love grow by taking care of yourself and your business. Don’t stop working out, eating right, spending time with your friends or anything else that you enjoy doing. Dropping everything in your life when you start seeing someone new is a bad sign.
If you or he has children, let your love grow by timing when you will meet each other’s children. Meet each other’s children after emotional intimacy has grown, but before sexual intimacy takes place.
Accept him the way he is. The more you let love grow, the less you will notice those things you may not like too much that stand out in the beginning, because you will start seeing and loving his inner light instead of outer details. Give the guy a chance to grow on you.
Show him your appreciation. Tell him thank you when he does nice things for you. tell him how nice he looks. Everyone wants to be appreciated and his love for you will grow because he sees that you appreciate and welcome it. He’ll know that your heart is open.
Show him signs of your love. When you end a phone conversation, tell him you love him. When you make a point of telling him that you love him, you show him you love him. Send an occasional text message or email him. Pay attention when he mentions something he’d like to have and on the appropriate occasion buy it for him. Let him know without a doubt that you love him.
Let love grow by developing trust. Trust supports your love and keeps it alive, be certain you can trust him to be faithful to you. He must be truthful with you, and he must keep his word, you must be able to trust him with your heart. He must be honest and have integrity.
Allow him to slowly seduce you and that is your way of seducing him. He leads and you follow, and you must allow him to lead. Allow real love to grow and guide you in knowing when it’s time for sexual intimacy.
You need to be able to trust that the man you are with will treat you gently and with love, as you open up your heart and soul, this kind of trust takes time to develop. It is well worth the wait.
Showing posts with label relationship intimacy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationship intimacy. Show all posts
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Relationship Intimacy-Part 2-Clues That It is Too Soon
Does the old saying still hold true about a man not buying the cow when the milk if free? Yes, this is still true, and if you have sex too early in the relationship you send out signals that you don’t value yourself enough to protect your emotions. As a result you lower your value in the man’s eye.
The question is: How do you know when it’s too early for relationship intimacy with your new guy? What are some of the signs?
This is what I call the Relationship Intimacy Test. Hopefully this will guide you into making the right decision.
If you have never been to his home. This could be because he is married or has a girlfriend, or a total slob. Bottom line, if you have not been to his home, you do not need to get intimate with him.
If you have never had a date with him on a weekend night or weekend day. This could mean that he is spending that time with a wife or girlfriend. If he doesn’t think that you are worthy of his quality time, then he isn’t worthy of your quality time.
You don’t have a commitment from him and you don’t want to say anything because you are afraid he will dump you.
You know or suspect that he’s married or has a girlfriend. Why waste your time with a man that is taken or worse, a player.
You haven’t discussed safe sex or any sexual illnesses that either of you may have. It is not wise to hope or assume that he is healthy.
Alcohol or drugs play a part in your relationship. It is not very wise to choose a partner when you are under the influence, as this leads to failure and heartache.
Relationship intimacy before you are emotionally ready for is gambling. You are gambling that his attitude toward you isn’t going to change. If your relationship becomes intimate with a man whom you are not monogamous, then he feels free to betray you. You are leaving yourself wide open for hurt.
Look for the signs that the man you are with wants a committed relationship with you. This means a discussion that you two are exclusive. Don’t have sex then as him where the relationship is going.
Don’t let your emotions override your good judgment because you are infatuated. When you have relationship intimacy too early you choose to value him more than you value yourself.
Relationship intimacy too early risks too much. You may feel bonded to him, but he may or may not feel bonded to you.
The question is: How do you know when it’s too early for relationship intimacy with your new guy? What are some of the signs?
This is what I call the Relationship Intimacy Test. Hopefully this will guide you into making the right decision.
If you have never been to his home. This could be because he is married or has a girlfriend, or a total slob. Bottom line, if you have not been to his home, you do not need to get intimate with him.
If you have never had a date with him on a weekend night or weekend day. This could mean that he is spending that time with a wife or girlfriend. If he doesn’t think that you are worthy of his quality time, then he isn’t worthy of your quality time.
You don’t have a commitment from him and you don’t want to say anything because you are afraid he will dump you.
You know or suspect that he’s married or has a girlfriend. Why waste your time with a man that is taken or worse, a player.
You haven’t discussed safe sex or any sexual illnesses that either of you may have. It is not wise to hope or assume that he is healthy.
Alcohol or drugs play a part in your relationship. It is not very wise to choose a partner when you are under the influence, as this leads to failure and heartache.
Relationship intimacy before you are emotionally ready for is gambling. You are gambling that his attitude toward you isn’t going to change. If your relationship becomes intimate with a man whom you are not monogamous, then he feels free to betray you. You are leaving yourself wide open for hurt.
Look for the signs that the man you are with wants a committed relationship with you. This means a discussion that you two are exclusive. Don’t have sex then as him where the relationship is going.
Don’t let your emotions override your good judgment because you are infatuated. When you have relationship intimacy too early you choose to value him more than you value yourself.
Relationship intimacy too early risks too much. You may feel bonded to him, but he may or may not feel bonded to you.
Relationship Intimacy Part 1
In today’s society it seems acceptable to have casual sex, however, if you really have feelings for someone this could be a big mistake. Especially for women. It is common knowledge that men are more motivated by what they see, and women are more motivated by what they feel. When a woman gets intimate with a man, her feelings and emotions get involved as well.
When you first meet a guy, you are caught up in the excitement and thrill of it all and your judgment gets clouded. Keep in mind that his level of interest in you may or may not last and you will need to give him enough time to prove himself to you, to avoid getting hurt. You will have to see if he cares enough about you not to do anything to hurt you, and you will have to be certain you can trust each other. You’ll have to allow enough time to see if the two of you are compatible in the long run.
Until he has had time to develop feelings for you, sex to him is just sex, and doesn’t carry any deeper meaning or promise. Men get sex, while women give it, savvy women realize this.
Clearing the deck of sex keeps you in the present moment. When you become sexual too soon, you put all your energy toward your sex life, and you haven’t given yourself enough time to see how the relationship will develop. It also means that you are racing ahead. If you postpone sex, you will be able to see those red flags or other areas that need addressing.
If you engage in sex too soon, you’ll overlook what isn’t working because you have bonded yourself too closely to him.
Postponing sex does not mean that you are rejecting sex; it does mean, however, that you are choosing not to act on every sexual impulse, and it allows sensuality to come to the forefront. Connecting with another person first on an emotional and sensual level rather than the physical level builds a stronger, more intimate foundation. Wise women bond with a man emotionally, spiritually and intellectually before allowing a sexual intimacy to grow.
The man that is interested in you will not want to rush into sex, he will want to date you and see where the relationship goes. If you want to know who he is, say “no” to sex. The man who remains interested respects you and likes you for who you are, and a relationship with him is worth taking a look at.
When you first meet a guy, you are caught up in the excitement and thrill of it all and your judgment gets clouded. Keep in mind that his level of interest in you may or may not last and you will need to give him enough time to prove himself to you, to avoid getting hurt. You will have to see if he cares enough about you not to do anything to hurt you, and you will have to be certain you can trust each other. You’ll have to allow enough time to see if the two of you are compatible in the long run.
Until he has had time to develop feelings for you, sex to him is just sex, and doesn’t carry any deeper meaning or promise. Men get sex, while women give it, savvy women realize this.
Clearing the deck of sex keeps you in the present moment. When you become sexual too soon, you put all your energy toward your sex life, and you haven’t given yourself enough time to see how the relationship will develop. It also means that you are racing ahead. If you postpone sex, you will be able to see those red flags or other areas that need addressing.
If you engage in sex too soon, you’ll overlook what isn’t working because you have bonded yourself too closely to him.
Postponing sex does not mean that you are rejecting sex; it does mean, however, that you are choosing not to act on every sexual impulse, and it allows sensuality to come to the forefront. Connecting with another person first on an emotional and sensual level rather than the physical level builds a stronger, more intimate foundation. Wise women bond with a man emotionally, spiritually and intellectually before allowing a sexual intimacy to grow.
The man that is interested in you will not want to rush into sex, he will want to date you and see where the relationship goes. If you want to know who he is, say “no” to sex. The man who remains interested respects you and likes you for who you are, and a relationship with him is worth taking a look at.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)